The weirdest thing...

I'm feeling better and better every day now that I'm back at home. I've been told to not let my weight drop while on the treatment, so I've been taking full advantage of this perscription from the docs. I'm eating like a horse! At least four large meals a day with fruit and protein shakes in between. The funny thing is I'm still loosing weight! I was told that the chemo uses up a huge amount of calories as it is processed through your body,the nutritionalist ive been seeing has recommended 2000 calories per day while in an inactive state, more once I'm up and about, which I am. I suppose I should take advantage in between treatments while feeling sort of normal.

The weirdest thing happened yesterday morning. I had woke to a funny sensation in my upper stomach. I was hungry. Or at least my stomach was. The feed tube that's laying dormant in my stomach was being repeatedly pulled tight to my skin and then it would be released, it was as though my stomach was trying to eat the feed tube, grabbing at it and pulling it inside my body! It was the grossest thing ever, I was just stood in the middle of the bedroom thinking "what now?". I bolted downstairs and poured a big bowl of cereal and proceeded to chomp through it. My stomach turned its attention to this new input and stopped "chewing" on the tube. Okay, glad that's stopped, note to self- don't let your stomach get empty again.

The feed tube thing is becoming a real bone of contention at the moment. Of all the things that are being delt with in this its by far the most problematic, high maintanance, uncomfortable and generally weird element of the treatment. It was starting to get me down yesterday and I was wondering how I could get out of having it, while I'm aware of the important role it will play down the line, for now it's literally a thorn in my side.

Yesterday daytime was almost entirely consumed by phone calls either from or too freinds and family. Having been out of commission over the last week or so it was great to catch up, vent, but generally laugh about the situation. A coping mechanism perhaps, but one that works well.