23 of 30...

Okay, it's been a week or two since I last wrote anything on here. Life in London has become a strict routine of daily medication and daily hospital appointments. The "pain team" have been very good at staying ahead of things with regards the management of pain caused by the radiotherapy side effects. I like the way that they have pre-empted everything, making sure that I had the pain relief options at hand should they be needed as the symptoms worsen. They started me on a Morphine patch about 10 days ago. This is a small clear patch that allows the drug to enter my system slowly by being absorbed through my skin on my upper left arm. This can be added to as required by more morphine in tablet form if needed. I was also give a few different options of mouth washes that providing you learn the correct order they can be really effective in allowing me to eat with out too much pain or discomfort. I have also been issued a nebuliser, this is a breathing mask that works alongside a pump to give a vapour of saline solution that helps get rid of the dryness that occurs through the silva glands being damaged or disabled through the treatment. I use this twice a day, but is very useful first thing in the morning.
Some days we can be in and out of the hospital in half an hour, but this is rare. More often than not we end up having extended appointments or being reffered to another specialist and a one hour day can easily turn into four! It's great that they are being so thourgh, but it's takes its toll on me. I find after a short time now my voice gets very weak, not good when you are having to answer so many questions. I often get back to the flat and pass out in my room. I did yesterday at 2pm and woke up this morning! I guess it's the cumulative effect of the treatment as well that's knocking me for six.
We had a bit of a scare last week, I started getting intense pain in the base of my skull. The kind of pain that stops everything and on a few occasions it dropped me to my knees. I had something similar  following treatment first time around, but when I reported it to the hospital in Cornwall the said it was to be expected and there was nothing they could do. This was not the response here... they were deeply concerned! This freaked me out quite a bit and despite the doctors saying "we need to scan you to make sure everything is okay" and " don't worry too much it's unlikely that it's the cancer spreading"... I had heard those words before and they offer very little reassurance. So once again we enter into the process we know all to well. The CT scan was done on the Friday morning and I got a phone call from the head and neck nurse that afternoon to say that there was "no evidence of cancer in that area"... the relief was immense!
We had a meeting today with the Maxi-Facial surgical team. They want to do a graft that will seal the hole in my jaw that links my mouth with my sinus. This was originally cause be the removal of a wisdom tooth following my first treatment. The bone in my jaw has been unable to heal due radiotherapy damage. The infortunate side effect of this is when I drink, liquid makes its way from my mouth out of my left nostril at random. Not a major issue... just embarrassing. They want to resolve this, but won't be able to do anything until the radiotherapy treatment has ended and the damage has healed. He did mention that he was hearing from all the different departments that my treatment was looking really good and is very much on track for being successful. This was another great piece of news! While we know nothing is ever certain in this game it was still nice to leave clinging to the positivity of his closing statement.
It feels like we are one the home straight now with end most definitely in sight! I know Joel has been struggling this week and even though I speak to him daily it's always very upsetting for him to say goodbye. In all honesty I've just had to try and put it all out of my mind as much as possible. It's the only way I can cope. I only have to dwell for second on home and realise how much I want to get back there. The feeling is crushing and I try not to go there. It's been nice to see friends who have visited as well, but we made a desision that was encouraged by the doctors that the remaining time here in London is to be dealing with what is most important... and that's the treatment.
So... just 7 RT sessions to go. I spoke to Bethan's dad today and we arranged transport back home to Newquay on the 12th of Feb. I honestly can not wait to get home.